De-Everything

De-skinned, de-boned, de-everything. A lamb led to the slaughter. I have to re-learn surviving in this environment again. Two things that I've lost during my pro-longed vacation in Oz, foresight and strategic planning. I need to be neurotic again, to think two-three steps ahead for every possible little thing that could go wrong. In my venture to Makati yesterday, I didn't foresee how long the commute would be. I didn't foresee that Butch would take so long to book his Cebu Pacific tickets because the ladies behind the counter were low on vitamins and minerals. Worker drones who obviously didn't care that they do their job properly. We took the MRT from North avenue, I forgot the queues could be so tortuously long and slow. I don't mind walking under the sun anymore, but I forgot the humidity literally makes you a walking sweat machine. I forgot how home is literally your only sanctuary. The streets of Manila are unforgiving. Dirty, noisy, tiring, hostile. Its an extreme sport just getting from point A to point B. I had forgotten how to navigate, second-guessing myself about the layout of the city. Was I gone that long? Don't think so.

I need to be a worry-wart again. I felt so disorganised for my interview/teaching demo today. I hadn't even practiced delivering the damn thing. Once, in the cab on the way. I counted on the adrenaline rush to do it for me...and I think I delivered. The dean is a lovely woman...we spoke for an hour. Well, I did most of the talking...more like rambling really. Predictably she asked me about the role of the Church in politics....I hope she heard the answer she was looking for. Haha. The teaching demo went well...for something I put together at the last minute. The faculty in attendance were from diverse fields, but all from UP. They knew where I came from. We speak the same language...so that was small comfort.

I need to organise again. My hiatus in Australia has rendered me dull. Now, I feel my being coming back to full life. I have renewed respect for the dwellers of this city. We are made of stern stuff. This environment is pushing me to function again in full gear. Ha. I am home. Welcome back sparks. Welcome back. :)