In "Castaway" the last scene has Tom Hanks' character standing in the middle of a crossroad. He had finally accepted having been stripped of his old life, and suddenly found himself not knowing where to go. This is what it feels like to be at that crossroad, moving towards a direction for so long, and then having to stop. What to do, what to do?
I have changed. And the only reason why I know this is because everything else I have left behind is the same. I do not want to have to wear the same old me. It is soiled and worn and unappealing. My old life, my old friends, my old relationships, my family's old problems, my old career. My ship has been unmoored for so long, I don't know where to drop anchor. I thought it would be easy, to put back on the layers of the old me. I thought it would give back the comfort of the familiar. It has not.
Has it only been two weeks? Maybe I should give it some time, to mourn the death of my old self. But the horizon is calling.